This is the Invasion!

THE ORIGIN OF PHWOAR!!!

This, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, werewolves and vampires, is the beginning of the invasion. There will be no valiant resistance! You will not take us to your leader! You will lose teeth, drool waterfalls and suffer epic embarrassment ‘til you eventually learn to pronounce the word, ‘phwoar’.
We’re still working our tongue around it ourselves. But once you get a feel for the energy of the term, your lips will elasticize less, and you’ll be phwoaring like a phlion. ‘Phwoar!’ is that wild movement your mouth wants to make, when a giant monster eats a skyscraper whole without saying ‘grace’ first. ‘Phwoar!’ is when a super-massive black hole sucks your entire planet into its depths and you actually enjoy it. ‘Phwoar!’ is when angry men turn green and rip the shirts off their backs, and you feel the blood boiling in their veins. ‘Phwoar!’ is that tingling feeling the movies give you, when for one perfect moment you’re connected to everybody, absolutely everybody in the great voyage that is a theatre’s darkness.
For the forseeable future, the team manning the shiny new UFO in front of you have the best jobs in the world. I’m not going to lie to you: we get to watch movies for free. We get to meet chicks. We get paid to watch movies for free and meet chicks. Fundamentally, though, while Obama saves the free world and Real Madrid destroy football, we get to talk about movies, and so do you. If you stick with the ship and luck’s on your side, you get to watch the occasional movie for free. You get to meet chicks, or boys, or us. You get to talk about movies and ultimately decide which ones you actually watch, because we’re a democracy somehow, and we’ll be listening the whole time. Yes, this is the invasion – but with cupcakes for everybody.
July’s going to be huge, and you’re thinking it’s halfway over already – exactly. This week we’re hooking you up with one of four free tickets to a movie screening of your choice - for the 25th/26th of July. Just take part in our poll by posting a comment and your name, then e-mail your contact details to phwoarbox@gmail.com. Our current topic: which world-famous movie monster, between King Kong and Godzilla, would you like to elect as honorary President of Ster Kinekor? Speaking of democracy somehow.
Have a blast, everybody, and don’t forget to phwoarrr! – with emotion this time.

The Editor.